eXtraordinary Inspirations
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Sunday 06/22/2014 11:48:07 CDT
We don't make mistakes, we just have happy little accidents.
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Sunday 06/22/2014 11:36:05 CDT
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Sunday 06/22/2014 07:44:28 CDT
To jaw-jaw is always better than to war-war.
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Saturday 06/21/2014 21:00:40 CDT
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
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Saturday 06/21/2014 20:12:17 CDT
When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.
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Saturday 06/21/2014 14:18:39 CDT
We must all hear the universal call to like your neighbor like you like to be liked yourself.
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Saturday 06/21/2014 13:39:05 CDT
Total absence of humor renders life impossible.
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Saturday 06/21/2014 03:56:28 CDT
So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me
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Saturday 06/21/2014 02:28:37 CDT
I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
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Friday 06/20/2014 22:09:05 CDT
The competent programmer is fully aware of the limited size of his own skull. He therefore approaches his task with full humility, and avoids clever tricks like the plague.
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Friday 06/20/2014 15:16:25 CDT
Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it.
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Friday 06/20/2014 11:40:13 CDT
If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track
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Friday 06/20/2014 05:47:52 CDT
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
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Friday 06/20/2014 03:58:41 CDT
The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work.
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Friday 06/20/2014 00:02:10 CDT
There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
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Thursday 06/19/2014 19:37:54 CDT
Mother-in-law = A woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of hers.
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Thursday 06/19/2014 13:20:20 CDT
My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.
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Thursday 06/19/2014 12:15:09 CDT
I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.
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Thursday 06/19/2014 05:02:53 CDT
He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
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Wednesday 06/18/2014 17:48:45 CDT
Linux is like living in a teepee. No Windows, no Gates, Apache in house.